Enter the Card Game: Episode 3 - "Card Games and Money"

[Ginsu]

“Enter the Card Game”

Welcome to “Enter the Card Game!” This is a comprehensive guide of how to succeed in the world of card games. We will help you become the Yugi you’ve always wanted to be and avoid becoming the Tristan of your group; If you know what we mean…….

Lesson 3: Card Games and Money

“Mo Money, Mo Card Games”

In the world of Yugioh, many players struggle with not having enough money to obtain the most playable and essential cards. They often complain about not having Tour Guides, Rescue Rabbits, or whatever the flavor of the week happens to be.

They will say this, “Those guys with good cards sure are lucky because I’m really good at this game; I just don’t have good cards. If I had those good cards I would totally beat them all the time because I’m way more skillful than them.”

I’m sure you all know someone like this. They are REALLY good at the game (apparently), but they always lose because their deck is a “budget” deck.

Now, you may be asking, “what is a budget deck?” Well, let’s start with defining the word budget.
In the context of this situation, Dictionary.com defines “budget” as a limited stock or Supply of something. This seems to makes sense. You have a limited Supply of cards and have to use what you have. However, the Yugioh definition of budget means something completely different.
Budget: A deck of 40 to 60 cards that is the equivalent of horse s**t. The deck is often decorated with praise of originally and the willingness to defy the norm. However, this praise is misplaced.


You NEED money to play Yugioh. Yugioh isn’t about being creative or expressing yourself through your deck; it’s about creating the most expensive and unfair derp deck that can win as fast and as skill-less as possible.

Of course the issue that most of you have is the lack of money to spend on this game. So here are some tips to help you in your monetary endeavors.


Tip 1: Steal. Just steal money from your parents/guardians. Even if you don’t have money, it is likely they have some. Sure, they were probably gonna use it pay for food, gas, taxes, and others things that actually help you, but let’s be honest; Yugioh is WAY more important.

Tip 2: Steal the actual cards. Just go to a locals, go into ninja mode, and steal the actual cards. This is great because it eliminates the middle man. It’s like stealing candy from a baby.

Tip 3: Don’t have a life outside of Yugioh. If you have nothing else to do except play Yugioh AND you have a solid part-time job (if you’re a teenager) or a full-time job (if you’re an adult) then you can easily afford to play Yugioh. You won’t be spending money on a girlfriend and you won’t be wasting money on gas and food by hanging out with your friends. Then you will have all this extra money that can either collect dust or be spent on Yugioh cards.

Tip 4: Get breast implants. This only really applies if you are a girl, but if you make yourself really attractive then you could seduce the “pros” into GIVING you cards. It’s pretty ingenious actually. Guys will gladly give a hot girl their deck. If you know what I mean….

Tip 5: If all else fails, quit. It’s that simple. Yugioh is a children’s card game that requires nothing short of a job’s income to be successful at. If you can’t afford it, just quit. Go play Magic the Gathering or something, I hear you actually win valuable prizes in their tournaments.


Remember, Yugioh requires lots of money. In fact, Yugioh is a lot like life, the more money you have, the more successful you will be.
DON’T BE ORIGINAL. You aren’t creative and you suck. Just copy the best deck, things will work out a lot better for you.

Well hopefully these tips have improved your card game obsessed life! I'm sure you are curious of what episode 4 will be about! I decided that since I'm hear to help you, I want you guys to tell me what the next episode should be about. Just post your ideas on this thread. I want to help you with your specific issues.

Author's Note: Obviously, I am against stealing and things like it. If you don't understand the message that my humor has, then you probably wouldn't have made it to episode 3 anyway...

[mapsal 313]

That was... not so good... =(
I liked the others more. Don't know why.

[Ginsu]

Originally Posted by mapsal 313

That was... not so good... =(
I liked the others more. Don't know why.

what about this one did you not like?

[SerenadeDS]

I agree that the others were more enjoyable, but this one wasn't too bad.

It more or less depends on how you interpret it. Obviously all those points are just jokes, and as long as you aren't taking this seriously (which, you probably wouldn't be if you read chapter one) you can get away with it.

I think it had more to do with the topic than the humor, honestly. It's hard to make money-related things funny because they always turn back to the same points, but I think you handled it pretty well. I honestly would've made every point "Steal." except for 3 and 5, and then save those for last. XD

Keep up the good work.

[Ginsu]

Originally Posted by SerenadeDS

I agree that the others were more enjoyable, but this one wasn't too bad.

It more or less depends on how you interpret it. Obviously all those points are just jokes, and as long as you aren't taking this seriously (which, you probably wouldn't be if you read chapter one) you can get away with it.

I think it had more to do with the topic than the humor, honestly. It's hard to make money-related things funny because they always turn back to the same points, but I think you handled it pretty well. I honestly would've made every point "Steal." except for 3 and 5, and then save those for last. XD

Keep up the good work.

I see what you're saying. I made so many stealing tips because there is so much theft in this game it's not even funny. You really have to guard your stuff at events or it will vanish. My level of seriousness was also explained in my "author's note"

[Moose]

Agreed that its not as good but still not too bad. You should've made a reference to being rich like Kaiba. You should make the next one about preparing for a tournament and how you have to play with your deck a lot to get ready.

[Ginsu]

Hmm. That's an interesting idea for the next episode. I may do that, unless someone else has a better idea.

[SerenadeDS]

I request a segment on Dueling and Probability!

But I like CavMoose's idea too.

[Ginsu]

Originally Posted by SerenadeDS

I request a segment on Dueling and Probability!

But I like CavMoose's idea too.

when you say dueling and probability do you mean like 40 card decks having higher probability than 41 card decks. If you could please elaborate because this sounds very interesting.

[Moose]

I think it would be hard to make probability funny. I mean besides pick a card any card, there isn't much you can do with it. I like the concept of it though

[Ginsu]

Originally Posted by CavMoose

I think it would be hard to make probability funny. I mean besides pick a card any card, there isn't much you can do with it. I like the concept of it though

i agree. but I'm up for the challenge. I have about 5 more ideas for episodes, but I want this to be as interactive as possible, so I want to use as many ideas made by other people as possible.

[SerenadeDS]

Originally Posted by The Nimrod

when you say dueling and probability do you mean like 40 card decks having higher probability than 41 card decks. If you could please elaborate because this sounds very interesting.

Yeah. And how having 3 copies in a deck would increase your chances of drawing it and things like that.

In the same vein as "bigger isn't always better" from chapter one.

I figure you can do it. :P

[Ginsu]

Originally Posted by SerenadeDS

Yeah. And how having 3 copies in a deck would increase your chances of drawing it and things like that.

In the same vein as "bigger isn't always better" from chapter one.

I figure you can do it. :P

ah I see. I think I'm going to do this one as well. I'll probably do tournament preparation as ep4 and this as ep5.

Then I'll try and makes these:
Card Games and Parents
Card Games and School
Card Games and Social Life
Card Games and Cheating

I appreciate your ideas guys. Like I said earlier, I want this to be interactive.

[SerenadeDS]

Originally Posted by The Nimrod

ah I see. I think I'm going to do this one as well. I'll probably do tournament preparation as ep4 and this as ep5.

Then I'll try and makes these:
Card Games and Parents
Card Games and School
Card Games and Social Life
Card Games and Cheating

I appreciate your ideas guys. Like I said earlier, I want this to be interactive.

These all sound good.

Look forward to reading them.

[mapsal 313]

Well, I'm not so sure what made me like this less... Maybe too much stealing? But then again, it's just something written to be funny and not to be taken seriously.

Anyway, I have my idea as well. You can make one about what you can do when you are dueling some one that is screwing you from the first turn, if you get what I'm saying.

Now that I read it again, it looks better...

[Masterplay]

Originally Posted by The Nimrod

ah I see. I think I'm going to do this one as well. I'll probably do tournament preparation as ep4 and this as ep5.

Then I'll try and makes these:
Card Games and Parents
Card Games and School
Card Games and Social Life
Card Games and Cheating

I appreciate your ideas guys. Like I said earlier, I want this to be interactive.

Stole my suggestions

[Ginsu]

Originally Posted by mapsal 313

Well, I'm not so sure what made me like this less... Maybe too much stealing? But then again, it's just something written to be funny and not to be taken seriously.

Anyway, I have my idea as well. You can make one about what you can do when you are dueling some one that is screwing you from the first turn, if you get what I'm saying.

Now that I read it again, it looks better...

Hmm thats a good idea. I like. It will be done.

Originally Posted by Masterplay

Stole my suggestions

haha. well I'll make them just for you lol

[Masterplay]

Hah
Tip 1:Steal
Tip 2:Steal more
Tip 3:Become a loser
Tip 4:Become a hooker
Tip 5:Rage quit the 1 thing that makes you happy.

Your very good at advice

[Ginsu]

Originally Posted by Masterplay

Hah
Tip 1:Steal
Tip 2:Steal more
Tip 3:Become a loser
Tip 4:Become a hooker
Tip 5:Rage quit the 1 thing that makes you happy.

Your very good at advice

Well of course.
I give advice as well as John Stewart reports the news.

[Masterplay]

How bout Card Games and Noobs

[Ginsu]

that's an interesting idea as well. Looks like I have a lot of work to do.

[Masterplay]

Originally Posted by The Nimrod

Well of course.
I give advice as well as John Stewart reports the news.

Naw,you give advice as much as Always Sunny makes me laugh.

[TheSparringPanther]

Good chapter, good chapter. Very deep as well. Basically, you steal, steal. fail or prostitute yourself...? Oh, or just quit. Thats exactly how life works!

But I take the Kaiba of the group does not have too suffer the consequences of these hardships of life.

At least I am not Tristan.

Originally Posted by mapsal 313

That was... not so good... =(
I liked the others more. Don't know why.

Originally Posted by SerenadeDS

I agree that the others were more enjoyable, but this one wasn't too bad.

It more or less depends on how you interpret it. Obviously all those points are just jokes, and as long as you aren't taking this seriously (which, you probably wouldn't be if you read chapter one) you can get away with it.

Originally Posted by CavMoose

Agreed that its not as good but still not too bad. You should've made a reference to being rich like Kaiba. You should make the next one about preparing for a tournament and how you have to play with your deck a lot to get ready.

Dont listen to them! They are just angry that you revealed their tactics lol

Originally Posted by The Nimrod

ah I see. I think I'm going to do this one as well. I'll probably do tournament preparation as ep4 and this as ep5.

Then I'll try and makes these:
Card Games and Parents
Card Games and School
Card Games and Social Life
Card Games and Cheating

I appreciate your ideas guys. Like I said earlier, I want this to be interactive.

Please do School first xd

[Ginsu]

well I'm glad you liked it. I'll release new episodes soon. I want to try and put out 3 at once.

[Moose]

how long til the next episode???